I S   T H E   C O U P L E   A   T R A P ?

PART1   |   PART 2

PART 1
Motto: “When love is infinite, the impossible easily becomes possible.”

Many people spend a big part of their life and waste a lot of their creative energy trying to be different form what they are.

First they try to be as their lover would like them to be but, in time, they get tired of this attitude, which is not natural, they get bored of being unsincere to themselves.

Thus, they fail to experience some pleasures and states, that they could naturally enjoy, as they are afraid not to unveil some bad, hidden aspects of their character.

This unconscious play, with very serious consequences, which finally leads to separation or suffering, develops because of the conditioned love of at least one of the two, who is trying to fulfill certain “unwritten conditions and rules” of the relationship.

In a harmonious sexual relationship, based on love, it is much more attractive and useful to completely open yourself, to show your real face, being spontaneous and natural.

If the being beside us really loves us, she/he will be more understanding and won’t pretend us to be different from what we are. If we cannot be sincere with our beloved, then with whom can be?


THE SHARING OF EROTIC FANTASIES
In most of the couples the two are too inhibited and shy in order to share their erotic fantasies. Anyway, this isolation is ridiculous when the two love each other.

In this case, sexuality should be a natural part of our being and our erotic fantasies could reveal lots of hidden wishes and aspirations which do not manifest themselves in our common behavior.

A major obstacle in sharing our erotic fantasies is the wrong belief that they are nothing but repressed wishes, which some people cannot even conceive that they might become reality.

The beneficial and creative fantasy is an attribute of the refined eroticism and thus it can be creatively stimulated. The only rule you must obey is that these beneficial erotic fantasies should be told in an exciting way and focused on the beloved.

The kind of attitude: “Here you have my erotic fantasies which I am going to tell you so that you know who I really am” could stress the other one especially if you offend his vanity through it. Thus, the sharing of our erotic fantasies must be carefully and delicately done.

Especially women might consider their lover’s fantasies a veritable threatening, being scared that if they don’t fulfill it, their lover will look for someone else willing to satisfy these imaginary erotic wishes.

There are few women willing to listen, for example, to their lover’s fantasies with the neighbor and in case fiction becomes reality a huge tragedy will happen. But, there are more and more young couples considering that the complete sincerity in love is the best solution.

You must also choose the right time to share these fantasies; the best moment is after your couple is harmonious. It is useful to get inspiration for our beneficial erotic fantasies from the movies, books, magazines as this will make them less personal.


HAVE SINCERE TALKS
Many couples have to face a state of sexual surfeit and not only that they don’t do anything to get out of it, but they don’t even discuss about it.

They almost always blame the other one, waiting for the change to come from her/him and not from within each of them as it would be wise and harmonious.

This problem can be easily solved if we agree from the beginning that none should blame only the other one. The superior man is the one that realizes his mistakes by himself.

Anyway, what is important is to solve the situation through a successful cooperation and not to find the other one guilty. If we consider that an exterior “referee” is needed, we can ask for professional counseling.

PART1   |   PART 2